Accompanied by some random and some family pics (thanks, Heidi!)...
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
Trans-Siberian Orchestra - Old City Bar
So, Heidi's "'tis the season" series has inspired me...that and the fact that I am beginning to go cross-eyed working on a paper.
As I am working on this paper, I am listening to the Trans-Siberian Orchestra Christmas Eve and Other Stories album...for the third time in a row...
Yes, it may seem like overkill, but not to anyone who has listened to the album - TSO does rock-opera, but not like Green-Day's latest - no, they incorporate a much wider range of instruments and do original works as well as arrangements of the classics, like Beethoven and Tchaikovsky. I could go on and on, but suffice to say that they are incredible!
The storyline and music of Christmas Eve and Other Stories is one of my favorites - it has "Christmas Eve/Sarajevo 12/24," which you can catch on the radio this time of year, and "A Mad Russian's Christmas," which is the Nutcracker suite redone, and lots of people sync their Christmas lights to it (just visit YouTube).
Anywhose, one of my favorite tracks from my favorite album is "Old City Bar"
It never fails to give me chills:
"If you want to arrange it, this world you can change it. If we could somehow make this Christmas Day last, by helping a neighbor, even a stranger. To know who needs help, you need only just ask."
Thursday, December 6, 2007
pastimes
One of my favorite things to do at this time of year - especially during these last weeks of the semester when things are just crazy and hectic and stressful - is to go running at night, listening to Christmas music from a local radio station on my mp3 player and looking at peoples' Christmas lights. Maybe not quite as "productive" as getting school-related reading done while working out at the university gym, but very nice and refreshing and relaxing. You should give it a shot sometime.
Monday, December 3, 2007
And some more...
I am capable and deserving. I am capable and deserving. I am capable and deserving....
Self-affirmations for E-day
Yes. The big "E" - that would "evaluations." Evaluation day would be that day that I leave class 20 minutes early so one of my students can distribute evaluation forms and bubble sheets and every student (present) can whip out #2 pencils and go to town.
I hate evaluation day, because, though the evals themselves can be helpful (and I say "can" because one never knows exactly what kind of comments you get, if any at all, and how helpful they are - some you need to take with a grain of salt, but some really are helpful), but they still stress me out, and we don't even get the results back until mid-january, even into february.
Ack! I hate the waiting game. At least with the evals I hand out at midterms, I have instant gratification. That way it's more like ripping off a band-aide quick-like instead of this agonizingly slow and painful wait. Plus I'm worried, as always, about the results. This semester started off well (I thought) and lots of the students have told me that they like the class (not that they only like me - they actually like the class - which is good). But I just dunno'. the one section seems pretty consistently positive, but the other section - I frequently come out feeling convinced I don't know what I'm doing and have no business being here. In fact, maybe it was even irresponsible of me to accept the teaching position. So I really don't know what to excpect - but I want so badly to be GOOD at this - and I don't mean "good" as in well-liked, I mean "good" as in a good and effective teacher. And it scares me to think that I might not be - maybe that's not my niche in life at all. And that I possibly wasted the time of all my students all this semester.
And most of them I get to have again next semester. scary.
And I SO don't want to be one of "those" graduate students contributing to the negative image of grad-students teaching - schools that don't have grad students teach always point out the schools that do in negative ways - that students are getting the bad end of the deal if a grad student is teaching the class instead of a "real" professor. I don't want to help further that image.
But, it is okay, 'cause even if I end up feeling like I totally screwed this semester over for myself and at least the one section of my students and I don't get to teach this class again and whatever, I will find my place in life. I have a lot to offer, and every part of me - even the faults and things I think I want to change - they still make me who I am. Everyone needs to remember those things about yourself that make you YOU. And even though we can all benefit from some self-evaluation and being open to change, it is also important to preserve those core parts of ourselves.
I also take comfort in trying really hard to treat others the way I would like to be treated, as well as the way others have been gracious enough to treat me. And I will find my niche. Everything works out in the end.
That said, my stats homework aint' gonna' do itself. =0)
I hate evaluation day, because, though the evals themselves can be helpful (and I say "can" because one never knows exactly what kind of comments you get, if any at all, and how helpful they are - some you need to take with a grain of salt, but some really are helpful), but they still stress me out, and we don't even get the results back until mid-january, even into february.
Ack! I hate the waiting game. At least with the evals I hand out at midterms, I have instant gratification. That way it's more like ripping off a band-aide quick-like instead of this agonizingly slow and painful wait. Plus I'm worried, as always, about the results. This semester started off well (I thought) and lots of the students have told me that they like the class (not that they only like me - they actually like the class - which is good). But I just dunno'. the one section seems pretty consistently positive, but the other section - I frequently come out feeling convinced I don't know what I'm doing and have no business being here. In fact, maybe it was even irresponsible of me to accept the teaching position. So I really don't know what to excpect - but I want so badly to be GOOD at this - and I don't mean "good" as in well-liked, I mean "good" as in a good and effective teacher. And it scares me to think that I might not be - maybe that's not my niche in life at all. And that I possibly wasted the time of all my students all this semester.
And most of them I get to have again next semester. scary.
And I SO don't want to be one of "those" graduate students contributing to the negative image of grad-students teaching - schools that don't have grad students teach always point out the schools that do in negative ways - that students are getting the bad end of the deal if a grad student is teaching the class instead of a "real" professor. I don't want to help further that image.
But, it is okay, 'cause even if I end up feeling like I totally screwed this semester over for myself and at least the one section of my students and I don't get to teach this class again and whatever, I will find my place in life. I have a lot to offer, and every part of me - even the faults and things I think I want to change - they still make me who I am. Everyone needs to remember those things about yourself that make you YOU. And even though we can all benefit from some self-evaluation and being open to change, it is also important to preserve those core parts of ourselves.
I also take comfort in trying really hard to treat others the way I would like to be treated, as well as the way others have been gracious enough to treat me. And I will find my niche. Everything works out in the end.
That said, my stats homework aint' gonna' do itself. =0)
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